I have nothing to be ashamed of.

I have done nothing wrong.

It's silly really. Other peoples misinterpretations, other peoples insecurities.

I have not betrayed anyone's trust. I will not. A lot of people have told me very personal things in confidence and I will tell no one of such things.

Only, certain people have decided that I will for what ever reason. They have took a dislike to me for what ever reason. They have tried to sully my character in public.

Yet still I will not betray their confidence.

I have been destroyed. Yet still I will not betray their confidence.

Even sillier? They have nothing to be ashamed of! They have done nothing wrong! It was not their fault, just as my situation with 'Maria' is not my fault. All I did was fall in love with her. All I did was want to see her but she lied to me, over and over again.

God knows what she's saying about me. I did nothing to hurt her. Nothing at all. I have no reason to lie to myself dear blog. No reason at all.

If I betray one persons confidence, I betray a lot of peoples confidence.

I will not do that. A lot of people have confided in me.

I find it hurtful that other peoples paranoia is sullying my character, along with other peoples lies.

I am not an aggressive person but if attacked, I will defend myself. Bullies at school knew not to mess with me for that specific reason. I wouldn't start a fight but I sure as hell would finish it.

I still miss Maria. Despite it all, I still want to talk to her. I still care about her. It still hurts. It hurts a lot. If I'd done anything bad to her, I would understand it but I didn't. We didn't even argue! We didn't even shout at each other once. It just doesn't make sense to me. But that's what I did wrong isn't it?