The second meaning
    To go back
       Make it stop before it started
          to stop the pain

I should have never been brought here. I should never have been made. All I do is create misery and anguish for others. It would be better for all concerned if I was dead.

Another nothing day. No work again. I haven't even ran. I haven't got dressed. I haven't washed.

There is one upside. I've hardly ate anything today. Maybe i'm loosing my appetite again. I don't know. It's too early to tell.